Abramelin experiences, diary notes & how to do it
The Abramelin Operation, how to do it, and my experiences with it
I have found it similar to a vision quest in the sense that when I went on my vision quest I did discover a part of my true will, the physical aspect of it, how I would play it out sort of thing. (yeah I'm being vague, I haven't finished manifesting it yet LOL). However I was not given the full picture, and did not unite with my HGA during the vision quest. So I found it the same but different. However those are just my experiences, it could be different for others. The vision quest was quite amazing btw!
As far as the initiatory vigils go, I think it is possible to meet your HGA, however to fully unite and bring yourself to a place where you can fully accept your HGA I think takes longer then 3-7 days. I think the initiatory vigils are awesome for contact, but not the complete thing. They are also awesome to help us define our true will, however again, the whole picture might not be given. Fortunatly with the initiatory vigils, well the ones I am familair with, they come at portal, so the magician has worked for quite a few years towards this. However there is nothing like the entire 6 month operation.
During the 6 months one spends most of the day everyday in meditation and comtemplation, without distractions! There really is nothing like this :) During that 6 months, the crap that gets in the way of the connection between ourselves and our HGA is cleared out. The baggage and issues that we carry around is cleared out like never before. Also during the 6 months our energy and power is raised to such a degree that we are more fully able to unite with our HGA.
I think one part of long workings (a few months or more) is this building up of our power andconnection for the task at hand. Yes this can also be done daily as temple work, however it seems to have extra elements to it when it is a specific working. Over 15 years I have pretty much never missed a day of temple work (well accept that one month slacking time once,and a week off at onother point). Yet, I have completed more then one extended working, and it is far different somehow.
Also, Abramelin seems to have an energy stream all it's own that pulls the practitioner along to where they need to be. Fortunatly I found this to be non specific to path or religion :)
So I would say that a vision quest, as well as, initiatory vigils are very important they are slightly different then the abramelin operation itself.
I figure you mean logistically? It is easy enough, have a friend drop off groceries but not talk to you, just ring the doorbell. I actually had my upstairs roomates stock the fridge, and I had opposite sleeping and eating hours than they did. I usually waited until they left the house for the day. Aside from that I stayed indoors or in my back yard. A few times in the middle of the night I would venture out to the local park at the end of the block. For the first 4 months I worked from home so this helped in reducing my contact with people. Basically one just saves up so they can take the time of work, and prearranges so friends can drop off necessities. If you are wondering if I missed contact with people? Nope. I quite enjoyed the peace and quiet, as much as I enjoy socializing actually. It was a nice change :) If you are wondering what I did with all of my free time, meditated, read books on magic, did ritual, and made the Abramelin squares.
Yes, I completed the Abramelin Operation just over a year ago. It worked. I did discover my true will and definatly united with my HGA. I spent 6 months getting rid of all of the obstacles in my way to the connection. I then realized why it had been so difficult before to realize this connection. It was the most difficult, yet most rewarding 6 months of my life, and beleive me I have been through some tough times previously. For the most part, it is still really hard to put into words. You definatly do become one with love as well as strength.
One iteresting aspect of the Abramelin working is that even though I had been practicing magic for quite a few years before I did the working, I felt like I learned more in that 6 months about myself and about magic then I had in all of the years previous put together! And in those previous 10 or so years, I had studied daily, performed rituals, meditation, contemplation etc. daily, and kept up a very regular practice of inner work as well as introspection! So in other words, it is one hell of a working! My friends noticed that I came out of it more at peace. I feel that I changed completely LOL. When I completed the Abramelin working, I did not feel like an "adept" as is figured, I felt like I was just finally starting on the path of magic.
I was not raised religious at all, and do not have a set religion (even though I do honour certain Pagan Dieties), so my Abramelin operation was slightly different in wording then the book. I wrote out the daily orations to suit my beleif system, as well as created rituals to help me along. One interesting aspect is that partway through the operation I strongly felt it necessary to completely get rid of any path or system specific work, and use more neutral wording and rituals. So I even stopped doing my Enochian work until the end of the opearation.
Btw, yes I do really think that no contact with others during the last 2 months (and limited before that as the book states) is essentail for success in the working. Our day to day contacts and how our friends and aquiantance perceive us definatly sets up patterns for behavior as well as expectations for ourselves. It is definatly an interesting working, not many people spend a few hours completely alone in silence, let alone months, it is amazing what comes out of it!
I am putting together some of my journal entries throughout the working onto my website, but that is definatly a work in progress. If you want to be regularly updated when those come out please email me offlist. Also, you might be interested in the articles by Aaron Leitch that can be found online. He completed the 6 month working and has been able to put some of the experiences into words quite well.
I have now found that regular work is of course still necessary to maintain that connection. One thing I have found is that my magic does work much better. However during the Abramelin one finds out the large picture of their true will, and realizes all the frivolty they have been spending over the years doing magic back and forth for things they didn't really want or need. After the working you have a definate idea of what you want and what your true will is, and your magic is focused in those directions.
That is about all I can come up with at the moment, it is definatly beyond words! If you have any specific questions, or would like any advice on how to do the working etc. feel free to ask. I feel that the Abremlin operation is extremely important and beneficial to magicians on this path, so I am always more then willing to answer questions etc. about it.
Well of course if you have kids you would be around them :) If you have a s/o perhaps they would spend more time with them during the last 2 months then you would. However during the last week of the operation it is essential that you do not talk to or see anyone, so you would need to get someone to look after the kids during that week at a seperate location, or somehow so you do not run into them. Now of course if your kid is of a young age, they can come in and help you out during the actual end of the operation when you have the option of having a child seer :) HOwever in this case, they would only see you for a little bit during that time.
If you live with people other than your kids I reccomend as little contact as possible during the last 2 months, and none during the last week. During that last week do not even answer the door to the mailman! I had to instruct my roomates that even if the house does burn down not to interrupt me, I will get out on my own LOL.
The Abramelin operation is definatly long and challanging, but more than woth doing! :) Are you thinking of performing the 6 month operation? If so I highly recommend a yahoo group called Abramelin. Also, reading the actual Abramelin book over at least 5 or 6 times before you start is good :) At least twice is mandatory I think. Not that the prayers and religious aspects have to be the same as that of the book, but the basic outline should be followed in my opinion. Also there are a few supplies that one needs. For example a square sheet piece of silver, a lantern, a red over garment that you make, a veil that you make, a wand, etc. Btw, I sell Abramelin incense if you need any, bulk discounts for those performing the operation :) If you are planning on doing the operation and have specific kid logistical questions feel free to email me off list, maybe we can come up with some ideas.
Hey better then not doing it. I strongly recommend that you focus on your kether or tiphereth sphere or something similar for every moment of every day during the 6 months. This will make up for the public contact. I litterally mean all day every day. After a couple of months you will be able to maintain this focus as well as talk with others and do your job. I would also avoid your friends like the plauge. Your friends seek (subconsciously) to keep you the same. You also seek to keep yourself the same to keep those friendships. Also subconscious but it is there. I recommend not seeing a single soul accept those that live with you (and those at work) for the last 2 months. This is really really important. I beleive that there are some aspects folks can change from the original, and others that should not be messed with. I also recommend an oath to complete the 6 months. If you do take 2 weeks off, it would be way better to take the extra week before the end (final week) of the operation instead of the week after, from my experience.
The challenge will be a bit harder for you, to avoid contact with others, and to avoid extraneous talking. YOu would not beleive after a few months how much one craves social contact! LOL
With the whole television thing, make sure it is 100%, no radio as well, and no books besides magic/spiritual related. Congrats on the smoking. I sure hope you gave that up in time that when you are into your second month yuou don't have to deal with 2 things LOL. I do still recommend avoiding all crowds accept for at work.
I think the not eat meat thing is more about the energies involved. I enjoy eating meat, but have noticed that at times such as during the Abramelin operation that not eating meat does allow for different spiritual states. It is very important to stick to the ovo/lacto vegetarian thing to the letter, as in don't cheat. Each and every time that one cheats during abramelin it gives a larger chance of slacking and then not completing the 6 months. Also, some feel that the demons could use or enter into the meat. You are also supposed to avoid blood anywhere near you during the operation.
Keep in mind that the internet is yet another distraction. Anything past the first 2 months would go against the goals of the operation. Yes this includes magical forums 21st Century mage is an excellent book on the topic of modern Abramelin operations btw.
With the retreat center, cool idea Just keep in mind that during the last week that the people who are doing the Abramelin operation must not, under any circumstances see another person. I mean even look at them. I mean even have their presence in their room. This is more important then you can imagine! Some of the dangers of the operation are very real, and the last week is the deciding point...
I HIGHLY recomend avoiding ALL online activity for the last 4 months instead of just 2. The odd email during the 2nd two months is not bad, but I think forums etc. would be very counterproductive. You will know what I mean when you are done I recommend the 21st century mage book for questions like this Also, I recommend you start on some Abramelin oil. Yes I know it can be bought, but if you are actually doing the 6 month operation, I think making the oil yourself is a good idea. It is made by adding the ingreds to olive oil. I made my own Abramelin oil and put it on the sides of all of the windows and doors. I discovered this was an amazing protection, more so then any other protection I have ever seen! I also wrote the words on my alter in the Abramelin oil.
With the Abramelin oil, make sure you mix it together, then stir it once a week as well. It comes out more like Abramelin mud actually LOL. It works amazingly well though!
My Oratory was an entire very large room that I had been using as my temple for a couple of years previous to the operation. I had 3 windows in front of me facing east that I could open, and a large sliding glass door to the west so that I could go sit out in nature in privacy. My alter was in the center facing east.
It is truly amazing how we try to cling to our habits. I have noticed that our ego likes to cling to habits to distract us from going deeper. Just make sure not to give in, or it gets harder the next time! The thinking habits are hard as well...
As far as I know, my Abramelin operation was not Christian. Even in the Abramelin book it states how a Pagan would do the operation. For example, I do not beleive in "sin" as the Christians do, so that aspect of the operation I used to forgive myself for times that I felt I had screwed up or not done my best at something. The prayers I wrote myself. I used the headless ritual a lot for the first 3 months along with my prayers. I'm not sure what all other parts are Christian as I was not raised Christian and only went to church once out of pure curiosity of what they do, and that was a UU church. During the 6 months over time I came to realize that for me during this operation I had to drop any work that was part of a specific system, for eg Enochian. So I figure with this, if I was doing it by a Christian dogma, I would have had to throw that out as well. What sort of experiences are you curious about in particular? THat might give me some idea of which ones to post LOL.
If you check out Joseph Peterson's site, you will find that a LOT of the squares are different. He compares the German with the Mather's version. I did make the Abramelin squares during the 6 months, but have found that the ones my HGA give me work a lot better :) Custom squares for me I am guessing.
After having completed the 6 months, I think anything shorter, and anything less would not give the full results. The squares are only part of it, and the HGA is only part of it. (what is the rest of it? Well you have to do the 6 months to find that out ). 1.5 yrs would probably give an even greater result, but I would say that 6 months works. Since most folks don't spend even a day without talking to someone or watching TV 6 months is pretty good LOL. As far as figuring out how others can use the squares, I have never put any effort into that LOL. I have heard a brief mention of HCR folks using the squares (none of the HCR folks I know do though) which is pretty interesting :) So apparently it can be done. My squares work for me, I have used them for others, but never loaned them to others or made them for others. I think having the squares charged by the demons and one's HGA really helps though. If you do experiment with the squares pre-Abramelin, be sure to let us know how it goes.
I have completed it, and definatly did not use methods that were even remotely Christian, or Jewish/Hebrew for that matter :) The prayers you are to write yourself. In the book their are instructions for how Pagans are to do it :) The whole confessing of the sins thing, well I wasn't worshipping any diety, so I used this part as an inner work exercise to forgive myself for anything that was still cluttering up my subconscious. I think this part is very important as the north american society (at least) is ruled by guilt, it is part of the culture, and we absorb it unknowingly at times. If you have any specific questions as to how certain aspects of the Abramelin are done in a non Christian sense just ask :)
There is not that much I would have done differently.... I would have dumped my boyfriend before the operation instead of after LOL Or at least gagged him during the operation. I would have done the operation at 25 instead of 33 I would have not even bothered with Mather's Abramelin squares (boy do they produce some odd results) I would definatly have not cheated and gone to the mall that one day to purchase Christmas gifts for my friends. Oh you would not beleive the thoughts people have around Christmas! Beleive me, they are not about love and chear! I would not have cheated and gone on irc that one time in the 2nd 2 months. I would not have started thinking after spending an hour fully united with my HGA at the end :) Well OK that one prob couldn't be helped. I would have been strickter with the vegetarian thing. and most importantly, kept better diary notes!
You mean the silver that you skry your HGA in right? I used a 3" x 3" square one, the size of a post it note :) It worked well, and was within my budget. I still have it of course, and bring it out about once a month...
I too didn't think the Abramelin squares were a lot of use after the operation. For me I think it was because my magic worked so much more easily right away that I thought the squares were more something to attract one's ego into actually doing the 6 (or 18) month operation. Since then I have dusted off my albums of squares and been working with them. I have found that the Mathers squares sort of kind of work, and not always how I would have liked. However the squares that my HGA gave me REALLY work and well :) I have also asked my HGA for a couple of custom squares since the operation and they work quite well. I think that having the princes etc. help to charge the squares etc. etc. does really make a difference.
But I see one positive aspect to this whole "Adept" carrot thing... It gives your ego something to strive for . Egos can be lazy, and sometimes just the results of the magick aren't enough to get someone new on the path really motivated :) As far as Abramelin, I wouldn't say it made me an adept, but I would definatly say it made me WAY more adept than I was before!!! In some ways I learned more / did more in that 6 months than the previous 15 years!
Well I completed it, and yes I had to change a couple of things. I had to work during part of it. Luckly I work from home so I could still isolate myself. The text actually allows you to work for part of it, so I wasn't too far off. From what I recall the text said make up your own prayers, so I am good on that one :) My almond wand was witch hazel, it felt right and there aren't any almond trees here. I left the house to do some christmas shopping once lol Other than that, from what I can remember I followed the instructions.
My experiences has been "what the hell was I doing for all those years" when I get more knowledge or deeper understanding etc. After abramelin, I thought, "gee I have been whasting my time for the last 15 yrs". Lol, well I found out this isn't really true. All of the material that I had been doing and working on is what got me to where I could have these new revelations. I see the "outer order" stuff as just as important as the advanced stuff. YOu may suddenly realize that you were only scratching the surface in magick, and think that you would have done so much better if you had only included these great new techniques and insights you know, but it is all a process, a learning process. To me it seems the same as learning any craft. You learn better and more effeciant techniques as you go along, but the learning experience as well teaches you so much, this is also where creativety and new ideas come in :)
The other night I dreamt that I was standing in front of 5 jars of honey that were standing side by side in a row. I was told by some entity that this is how solomon did his magick. I then woke up and kept repeating that I have to remember this dream :) I then went back to sleep and dreamt that I was on some sort of quest for these 5 jars o' honey. The quest was a road trip with some magickal friends and my mother (who has long since passed over to the other side). We were in BC, Canada where I am from and wish to return to. For jar #3 or #4 we stopped by some home depot like store to get sheet metal to make the sigils. Then everyone left and I was on my own to get jar #5. I found it, and it was "aged" honey; it was darker in colour and had a richer feel about it. The whole time during the quest, I kept just knowing that this is how solomon did his magick. Any insights into this would be great :) Also, wondering what symbolism is associated with honey?
It went very well :) The last week was extremely frightning though, that whole losing the self thing. Boy do I cling on! During the final 7 days, everything happened exactly 12 hours before it was scheduled to, odd, but at least that way I wasn't prepared for it. The whole union with my angel bit was amazing. It is one of those indescribable expereinces that makes an acid trip seem mild! Definate oneness. During the operation I got to work out all (well it seemed like all) the issues that had been holding me back. The amazing thing was that a lot of my work over the years had been focused on weeding out, amazing how much I missed!
The part where I told the demons "who's your daddy" was extremely tiring but amazing. It took every ounce of my energy (there was a lot of sleep deprivation happening during that last week). Since part of the symbology with the demons is ridding oneself of their inner demons for good, I made a list of those things about myself I no longer needed, and re-established my command over them. After the operation I have felt a LOT of profound peace. That is the most noticeable difference. I would also say I am a lot less limited. A lot of the magickal concepts that I knew on an intellectual level, I have now experienced and am sort of united with.
It was really cool during the last couple of months, I could do all the advanced spritual practices that I have read about. For example crowley's asana and pranayama practices were extremely easy for me even though I had never practiced them before. I kept a diary of my experiences by emailing a very experienced magickian friend of mine. I can't wait until he prints them out. I would sit there in a very altered state in front of my computer and type out my perceptions of everything :) It was really hard to keep track of mundane things like saving emails. Anytime that I left the house and met with someone it was very difficult to communicate with them as I felt I would have to become more solid to do so. Luckly all of my friends are magickians, it would have been extremely difficult to communicate with a non-magickian.
It was quite interesting near the end as I still had doubts, I was doubting everything! Considering that the whole operation only took 6 months I would definatly say it was worth it. It is like getting 20 years of training in 6 months :) Also I was so open during the operation that I could experience and comprehend so much more. Here is my livejournal version, where I will add more when I get the emails back from my friend.
Be sure to check out my diary notes, also listed in the articles section.